I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
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My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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