Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Randomize
