You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger