piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
