His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
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