im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Randomize