Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
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