She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize
