physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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