I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
