There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize