No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
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