Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
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