Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
