I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
And then he peed in my hair
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