Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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