It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
You may now shotgun with the bride
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
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