Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Randomize
