Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
