I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
