do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
