glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Randomize
