Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
he puts the penis in happiness.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
Randomize
