im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
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