Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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