Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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