I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
