it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
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