I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
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lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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