so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
