She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
We had sex on a dog bed..
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
Randomize
