did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
babies were throwing up all over the place
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Randomize
