I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
Randomize