the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
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