i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
