The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
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