i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Randomize