It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
