He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
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