Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize