I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
