I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
