Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
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