The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
