Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
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