why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
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