i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day ππ#pensacolaproblems
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
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