quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Randomize