This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
