I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
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It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
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Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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