got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
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